A visit from a leprechaun

About a year ago, when The Boy had to get a tooth extracted because he had knocked it loose (over the course of several months), Cute Husband and I told him about the Tooth Fairy.

The Boy was less than enthusiastic about the idea and didn’t want the Tooth Fairy to visit.

“Why?” I prodded.

“I don’t want a strange creature coming in my room and taking my teeth,” he replied. “I want to keep my teeth.”

Considering the Tooth Fairy never visited my house (my mother had explained, ” I’m not a fairy. And what would I do with your teeth?”), I was fine with this. The absence of the Tooth Fairy meant I didn’t need to sneak into his room and carefully execute elaborate plans.

Simplicity is good.

Well, this past January, The Boy and his class learned about Ireland and its customs, traditions, and mythologies. But I don’t think The Boy really understood the “mythology” part because he has informed me rather emphatically on numerous occasions that leprechauns are, indeed, very real.

[sigh]

As today is St. Patrick’s Day, I decided to play the part of Leprechaun and leave a little present at his bedside: a little plastic canister with shamrocks on it containing a few dimes and a Mini Muggs figure of Hulk. (Hey – he’s green.)

When he saw the canister, he thought Daddy had left it for him. Thankfully, I already let Cute Husband in on my plan, so he knew what my intentions were. And Cute Husband dutifully led The Boy to the only logical conclusion: a leprechaun must have come and left this for him!

After this stunning realization, I asked The Boy to come with me to the kitchen for breakfast (Lucky Charms, of course, because I’m that original). He went into the bathroom, peered into the commode, then flushed it before he used it.

“Did you forget to flush it last night?” I asked.

“No,” he replied, “there was just some green stuff in it.”

“That’s odd,” I said. “What could that have been?”

“Maybe you cleaned it or put something green in it.”

“But the water turns blue when I clean it. Do you think maybe…”

The Boy’s eyes widened. “The leprechaun went potty?!?”

“And he didn’t flush.” I wrinkled my nose. “That’s disgusting.”

The Boy’s eyes lit up and pointed to some spots on the carpet that I’ve struggled to clean. “And he left leprechaun footprints!” he cried.

So the Tooth Fairy doesn’t exist in my house, and the Easter Bunny doesn’t drop by for visits.

But leprechauns are real.

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